Sharista Lachman suffers from the chronic skin condition Vitiligo.(The Hague 13-06-19)
Photo: Frank Jansen © Frank jansen

Small white spot spread rapidly across Sharista's face

What started as a small white spot quickly spread over the face, hands and feet of Sharista Lachman (28) from The Hague. For years she fought her vitiligo with thick layers of makeup. She now embraces the 'white butterfly' on her face and is even the figurehead for an awareness campaign surrounding the skin condition.

Anne Company 15-06-19, 13:34

A day at the beach with friends? For years it was not an option for Sharista Lachman (28) from The Hague. “What if I started sweating and water got on my face? Then the thick layer of putty would start to run on my face. That fear completely dominated my life.”

She was a first grader when the first white spot became visible. “Just a dot, actually. We thought about inflammation. The doctor suspected a form of eczema. I went home with a remedy and the expectation that it would go away."

It doesn't run in the family, my two sisters have even brown skin

It didn't, on the contrary. "After a few months, the dot had become a spot below my eyebrows and my palms also started to light up. During a subsequent consultation with the GP, a dermatologist from the hospital happened to be present. He finally provided clarity: he diagnosed vitiligo.”

It didn't ring any bells for the then 11-year-old from The Hague. "It doesn't run in the family, my two sisters have even brown skin. They are a bit older and have been working on their appearance and makeup for a while. Your skin is such an important part of how you look. They introduced me to the world of powders and foundations.”

Guinea pig

In the meantime, Sharista also had hope for a solution from the medical world. “I went to the hospital twice a week for light treatment. I was then exposed to bright light for thirty seconds. I was given all kinds of ointments to take home and I often felt like a guinea pig.”

The treatments had varying results. "The lights worked a little, but my skin burned very quickly. Not only did that hurt a lot, it was also not without risk. The risk of skin cancer would increase if I continued with it for too long."

And so Sharista continued to resort to a morning ritual of at least an hour and a half. "First I had to mix exactly the right color every time using different foundations. Then I applied it to my skin and let it dry for ten minutes.

Then I continued with concealer, which had to be absorbed for another ten minutes and so the time passed very quickly."

I had always associated my spots with being ugly

And that every day. “If I had to do some shopping at the supermarket across the street on a day off, I would spend almost two hours applying make-up. Without taking to the streets? It didn't occur to me. It didn't matter to me at that moment that I had to miss things or be late for appointments."

Friends and family all knew about Sharista's vitiligo. "I just talked about it, said that there was, as it were, a white butterfly over my face. But I didn't show it to anyone. Until I went on holiday with a friend when I was 22. We shared a bathroom, so she noticed when I took off my makeup.”

"I warned her in advance, but when I stepped out of the bathroom, she just said, 'What then? Do you think I look at you differently now? You're still the same Sharista!' I'm not sure what reaction I was expecting, but not this one. I had always associated my spots with being ugly. I have already filled in for others: they must be shocked by me. I wanted to prevent that.”

Despite her friend's down-to-earth reaction, Sharista simply opted for a life behind a layer of foundation after the holidays. “Wherever I went, I didn't go anywhere without a bag full of makeup items. I constantly looked at myself in shop windows and car mirrors to touch up my make-up if necessary. Exhausting, I think now."

Hide

The morning ritual also became longer and longer. "The number of spots increased over the years. I spent a lot of time on my face, but in the meantime the white on my hands became more and more visible. It started to bother me. I was someone who told others to 'be yourself'. And meanwhile I was just trying to hide myself.”

The turning point was a campaign by Vitiligo.nl, an interest group for people with the pigment disorder. "They were looking for someone for a photo shoot and I decided: this might be the time. Terrifying of course, just the way there gave me palpitations. My sister was there to support me on my way to Utrecht.”

There she met all kinds of peers with vitiligo. "Of course I recognized all their struggles, but it was certainly not a difficult day. Afterwards I went to a terrace with my sister, which I had absolutely not dared to do for fourteen years. It felt normal surprisingly quickly. We ate something, we drank something, it was just fun.”

Staring

Still, Sharista describes the first six months without makeup as tough. "I was afraid people were going to stare at me. And actually that happened. Sometimes people ask what's wrong with you, or give unsolicited advice on how to get rid of it. I am Hindu, and tips came from that corner on how I could get my pigment back through sacrifices and astrology. Well-intentioned, probably, but you don't always expect that. I had to give myself a pep talk every morning to get out the door.”

At that time, Sharista was also a job seeker. "I thought: I have to look presentable when I apply for a job. The urge to take the make-up boxes out of the closet was great. But I didn't do it and I can honestly say that the vitiligo didn't get in the way of applying for jobs at all. In fact, I was hired and got a job that required me to make a lot of contact with customers. It felt good that they trusted me with that.”

Sharista also vividly remembers the first family party she attended without makeup. “Everyone responded positively, but afterwards I did receive texts. “We had no idea it was so present,” they wrote. Everyone praised my courage, that's for sure."

Foundation

Sharista is now three years further. Where she goes and where she stands, the foundation stays at home. “It saves a lot of time, not to mention money. Those products cost me about 200 euros per month."

But the biggest gain is her newfound freedom. "I don't have to worry about weather conditions, I can just leave the house with at most some mascara and lipstick. Which also matters: there are now more role models with vitiligo. Winnie Harlow, for example, is a top model with the skin condition. It makes her unique, I'm sure she would be much less known without the skin condition."

If an ointment came on the market tomorrow that would make her skin even again, would Sharista use it? “No, I actually like myself now. When I'm with my two sisters, people often only remember my name. It makes me unique, and I cherish that now.”

I now take to the streets with a face that you will not soon forget

What applies to her does not necessarily apply to someone else, she emphasizes. "That makeup has made me happy for a long time, so I will never judge people if they continue to choose that way. I now have quite a few followers on social media through my work at Vitiligo.nl. What is striking is that most people still ask me for tips and advice about the right foundation and concealer colors. The question: what does it feel like to go out without make-up is hardly asked.

Every now and then Sharista takes the old make-up boxes out of the cupboard again. “Actually, mainly for fun. Then I meet up with friends and enter a café all dressed up. It's a bit of a laugh, but I don't want to go back to it for a moment. I now take to the streets with a face that you will not soon forget. I actually like that.”